And So This Is Christmas

December 28th, 2008 Posted in Story We all have our family traditions around the holidays.  For the Crowley side of the family it was the preoccupation with the quest for and adorning of the annual Christmas tree.  Ah, but this was no ordinary, store-bought, pick-the-first-one-you-see, off-the-rack evergreen pinus.  No indeedy, this was the one-of-a-kind, can’t find anywhere, super-duper, not your Charlie Brown, tree.  My father, being an engineer, was particular about his seasonal greenery.  I can remember as a child growing up in Chappaqua, spending the better part of a day or two search from nursery to nursery, Mount Kisco to Hartsdale, in quest of THE tree for that year.  Inevitably, after opening what seemed to be hundreds of trees (rule #1: NEVER buy a tree that has been previously unwrapped or opened), we’d heave the old gal up on the roof of the car and Dad would fastidiously secure the tree, as though we were about to take it on an intergalactic journey, rather than 20 minutes home.

Upon arrival, we would quickly get the tree into a bucket of water, mixed with an old family recipe guaranteed to extend the life of the already dead tree (some family’s pass along recipes for cookies and mixed drinks, our legacy is tree longevity elixir :-).  After erecting the beast, decorating commenced.

There was strict order to the process - none of string the lights, hang a few balls and throw on some tinsel ordeal.  Nope, this was a well executed plan, contemplated and drawn up weeks in advance.  And it would always commence with the “balancing.”  Now for the uninitiated, balancing refers to the act of assuring the tree is perfectly symmetrical, 360 degrees - no holes, no dips, no hangers.  Webster’s definition includes, to drill holes in the tree if necessary for placement of spare branches in order to fill the holes which may exist through imperfect maturation of the evergreen. In other words we performed plastic surgery on the Christmas tree - yep, our own little Nip n’ Tuck operation going on.

Meanwhile, Dad meticulously placed each light on the bows, usually tying each one to a branch for fear they may move about (always made the removal of the lights twice as interesting….).  This usually took the better part of two days.  So it wasn’t until Sunday afternoon that we even began to dress the tree with ornaments.

Another Crowley innovation was the introduction of the first-ever caste system for ornaments.  Equally rigid as the original Indian class system, our ranking of ornaments, by beauty or sentimental value, relegated most of the babbles to “2nds and 3rds.”  However anal this might seem, it served a very practical purpose.  The children were given the honor of decorating the tree with all their gusto, using the 3rds boxes, in the back of the tree.  This made for some interesting configurations through the years including the ever famous, “low lyers” move of placing all the balls below three feet - or-how-ever-high-we-could-reach move.

Finally, after much rearranging of the ornaments, and a few lighting adjustments, the lead tinsel was brought out of the vault.  This stuff could have wiped out an entire village, maybe even most of New England.  Who knew?

One of the many gifts my dear partner and wife, Marcy, has given me is the will to be strong.  To fight the urge to drill, baby, drill.  To buy trees from Home Depot.  To have it up and standing in under 15 minutes.  Her encouragement and support, and years of therapy have made me a better man.  A more complete person.  A recovering xmas-treeaholic.   So now our sons partake in the annual holiday tradition, and it is over in a flash.  However, despite all efforts, I still can’t resist the twinkling color lights.  “Eat at Joe’s” as Marcy calls them.  Indeed, and may this be my legacy.  Blink on little fellas, blink on.

So this is Christmas
And what have I done
Another year over
And training for Western has begun

A very merry Christmas
And a happy New Year
Let’s hope it’s a good one
Without any fear